12 Aug 2013

Feather Duster

For Homework:
Answer Question 8.
How does the writer build up a sense of danger.
You need to notice the context, which is that they are hunting and desperately hungry and the thing they've tracked is old and won't be good to eat.
ALSO the eagle owl.
'omen'  ominous or foreboding signs = gives a sense that bad things are going to happen

Write an Argument:
e.g. Girls are better than boys.
I should be able to stay in bed all day on a Saturday if I want to?
I should be able to have a TV in my room.
Being bossy is a good thing.

Good words to use:
because, however, although, as a result, despite this, even though, consequently, firstly, secondly, thirdly - either, or
-some people might argue that
-some people seem to think


TARGETS
1. Include paragraphs: emergency paragraphing if necessary - every 5-6 lines using // Ideally, use long and short paragraphs, and change paragraph at a mini-cliffhanger.
2. Check that names have a capital letter
3. Add in more sensory detail - e.g. tastes as well as

There was a fire in the room. The room had pink walls.>
She looked into the fire, the pink walls giving her a warm glow.

Firelight flickered up the pink walls, glimmering coral and amber.
  • alliteration
  • more interesting verbs (doing words)
  • more describing words per sentence
  • more interesting type of sentence
  • use -ing phrases 
  • you can use -ing phrases at the start of a sentence

Madison was drifiting off to sleep.

Drifting off to sleep, Madison sighed softly.
Sighing softly, Madison drifted off to sleep.

NOOOOOOO! Drifting off to sleep sighing softly.

Firelight flickered up the pink walls, glimmering coral and amber. Drifting off to sleep, Madison sighed softly. A half-eaten cake oozing with chocolate icing sat in a pile of its own crumbs on a delicate china plate on the table by her bed, the same crumbs dribbling down her chins.
One pink fat hand, rested on the pink silk quilt.
Everything in Madison’s room was pink, including Madison.


There was make up stuff on her dresser.
>On her make-up stained dressing table, sat a jungle of perfume bottles.
> On her lipstick stained dressing table, was a jungle of jewel-coloured perfume bottles.

There was a cake on the table by her bed.

She saw a shadow cross the room to her purse.
She was scared to death and ducked under her duvet until there was no air to breathe.
She approached her purse and found nothing but the coin.

Madison put the recently polished coin between her glossy teecth and bit down to see if it was real. The coin had deadly poison on it. She died later that fateful day.



Start sentences in different ways...
She [name] The




Homework:
Choose two paragraphs from your story and improve the description to create a strong spooky mood. Use this page (interesting words) to help you and also this page (how to describe place).
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1. Answer both parts of question seven from the past paper.
2. Cut and paste the Creepy Doll Apostrophe Exercise and add apostrophes in the right places.
3. Read this post. We will talk about this next time.

11+ Common Entrance Questions

Some questions ask you to pick out facts. For others, you need to figure out what the text means, using some facts as clues. So you need to interpret the information a bit more. Sometimes you can use common sense. But usually, you need to quote clues from the text.

This type of question is checking whether you understand mood in words:
Why did the writer choose these adjectives (a describing word)?
What effect do these words create? What mood do they give? What do they make us think/feel?

for example:
tight-shut > the idea of tight shut makes a claustrophobic mood, as if we are trapped
stand-still > the idea of stand-still suggests it is stuck in time, as if nothing’s happening

appalling (boy who is normally good) > this means that Harry is being so horrible it’s shocking
glare (at the boy) > this suggests that the lady is very frustrated with Harry.

Get the Exam Answers that we did here

Different ways to tell a story:
First Person, Second Person, Third Person... [click here to see what we wrote]